I'm Sorry Matilda
by Walkinthegarden
Summary: Sequel to Unique Secret, more to explain things. Mickey thinks back on the treasure he had for a sister, he realizes that... but to late. Now he must forgive himself. WARNING: talk of rape and suicide


**I'm Sorry Matilda**

**Mikey Wormwood's POV**

I never really paid attention to my sister, she was just someone who hung around with me and my family and spit off useless facts about whatever topic we were talking about. I never really got to know her, and for that I'm sorry. I still remember the day I found her body.

"_Mickey, go wake Matilda," mom told me as I came into the kitchen._

"_Why?" I huffed as I stared up at her._

"_Mickey."_

"_Fine," I whined as I walked towards her room. When I opened the door I found Matilda lying on her bed with an open book on her chest. I thought she was sleeping, since her eyes were closed, but I soon found that not to be the case. "Wake up!" I yelled at her, throwing a discarded throw pillow at her. When she didn't move, I walked over and shuck her. When she hadn't even made a sound, I got worried._

"_Matilda!" I yelled. Without thinking I ran into the kitchen and dialed 911. The paramedic said she was dead. _

_The next day Miss Honey and myself talked to the corner, it was then I found out a) Matilda had committed suicide by drinking a poison cleaner and b) my vial father had raped my sister._

To this day I wake up in a cold sweat from nightmares. I can only imagine her pain and it disgusts me what he did to her. Every night I wake up from memories, of when he did it. I can't believe I'd been so stupid when I was younger not to realize what he'd been doing. Maybe I could have stopped it, or at lest comfort Matilda so she knew she wasn't alone. I didn't think it, but I loved my sister, even then.

**I guess heaven was needing a hero**

**Somebody just like you**

I pick my cell phone, already knowing it was Sarah Lines, a woman I'd hired to take care of my mother.

"She's not getting up," the irritated woman said over the phone.

"It's your job to get her up," I bit back. I was getting tired of the phone calls in the late morning telling me my mother wasn't getting out of bed by herself. Ever since Matilda's death, my mother, like I, realized the treasure we'd had. She cried herself to sleep with the guilt of not being the proper mother Matilda needed. She tried to drink away the pain… not that it worked.

"Oh fine," Sarah said as she hung up her phone. I rolled my eyes and decided I might as well go shopping.

When I enter the shop, I don't believe my eyes when I see three people. Jane, Matilda's old school mate, was standing in an aisle with a nine month old baby on her hip. Her husband, Michael, was pushing the cart on the other side and looking at cereals. I smile as I start to walk over to her.

"Jane," I say simply as I step up to her. She turns her head and smiles at me.

"Hi Mickey. I can't talk now, but I'm introducing my new song in honor of Matilda tonight at the carnival if you want to talk," she said quickly as she gathered her fussy daughter.

"Ok, I'll see you then." I go on with my shopping and get everything my mother and I need.

When I get home I look over at the letter I'd received five years ago. As much as I hated it, I walked over and read it again.

_Dear Son,_

_My ten year sentence is over and I will be coming home soon. The three of us will be a family again._

_Harry_

The letter I'd replied with had been short and simple.

_After what you did, you are no longer welcome in mothers or my own lives._

_Mickey_

As the day went on, I got more and more excited about seeing Jane, we had a lot to catch up on. Figuring time would go faster if I slept; I sat down in front of the TV and fell into a deep sleep. When I woke up it was 7:06, time to go. I drove to the carnival in silence and was just in time to see Jane get on the stage.

"Ok everyone, I've been working on this next song for a while. It's a dedication to a good friend of mine that committed suicide 15 years ago when I was 18 years old. Her name was Matilda Wormwood and she was a wonderful girl, a hero." She smiled out at the crowd before the soft song came on.

"_I came by today to see you _

_Oh I had to let you know _

_If I knew the last time that I held you was the last time _

_I'd have held you, and never let go…"_ I smiled, the truth in her words were obvious by the tears she had.

"_Oh, it's kept me awake nights, wondering _

_I lie in the dark, just asking why _

_I've always been told _

_You won't be called home _

_Until it's your time…" _That had been a question on all our minds. Why Matilda hadn't had the faith to talk to someone, tell someone? Had she been scared? Had she loved her dad too much?

"_I guess heaven was needing a hero _

_Somebody just like you _

_Brave enough to stand up _

_For what you believe _

_And follow it through _

_When I try to make it make sense in my mind _

_The only conclusion I come to _

_Is heaven was needing a hero _

_Like you _

_I remember the last time I saw you _

_Oh, you held your head up proud _

_I laughed inside _

_When I saw how you were, standing out in the crowd _

_Your such a part of who I am…" _I smiled again. Matilda was a big part in everyone's lives. She's a part of us all, but she's most defiantly a HUGE part of Jane.

"_Now that part will just be void _

_No matter how much I need you now _

_Heaven needed you more _

_Cause heaven was needing a hero _

_Somebody just like you _

_Brave enough to stand up _

_For what you believe _

_And follow it through _

_When I try to make it make sense in my mind _

_The only conclusion I come to _

_Is heaven was needing a hero _

_Like you _

_Is Heaven was needing a hero _

_and that's you…" _Jane gave a tearful smile as her voice faded out. Only seconds went by before the crowd of people let out cheers. Jane smiled as she wiped away the tears and waved goodbye to the crowd. She quickly descended the stairs and took her daughter from her husband.

"That was great Jane," I told her as I walked up to her.

"Thank you Mickey," she said softly as she kissed her daughter's head. The baby giggled as she lay her head on her mommy's shoulder.

"Who is this little beauty?" I asked her as I smiled at the little girl.

"This is Matilda, it seemed right to name her that," she said softly.

"She kind of looks like her to." She gave out a small laugh at my statement before turning to face her husband.

"Tilda needs to sleep, I'll walk home later," she said as she handed the yawning child to Michael.

"I'll drive you," I told him at his uneasy face.

"Thanks," they both said in unison as her husband took off with their little one.

After a few hours of talking with her, we both started to get tired. We walked to my car and I drove her home. After dropping her off I went to the only place I ever truly felt peaceful. As I got out of my car and walked up the well worn path, I thought of my baby sister's funeral.

_I entered the room that held my sister's body. It was then I spotted Miss Honey sitting in the first row. I walked over to her to see she was crying._

"_Hello Miss Honey," I said softly as I sat down next to her._

"_Oh, hello Mike," she said as she let out a sniff._

"_I heard you quit your job at the school," I said as I leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees._

"_Yes, there are too many memories there. I've decided to go to Chicago, there are many schools that need teachers," she said as she brushed away her tears._

"_You haven't asked for my advice, so I'm going to give it to you. I don't think leaving will make you feel any better, you'll just be running away from the pain. You were Matilda's favorite teacher, and I really wish you would stay," I told her. Without waiting for a response, I got up and walked away. Her head followed me, watching me._

Miss Honey took my advice and stayed, much to my surprise. She eventually got married and now has a three year old daughter name Melinda.

I stepped up to a sculpted piece of marble. I looked down upon it… it'd been awhile since I'd set foot there. Weeds and vines had taken over; the weather had worn the marble and made the letters only just readable.

"Matilda…" I said softly as I stared down at it.

_Matilda Wormwood  
April 4th – October 3rd  
A little girl that will forever be missed_

"I'm sorry Matilda…" I whispered.


End file.
